Lupus is SHE...

 Those who know me, KNOW, I name EVERYTHING! So Lupus is named Lupus and she is a she because she is a part of me. I wake up, go about my day, sleep, eat, and Lupus is still here. She invades my space and gets on my nerves. Many people have had so many questions when it has come to her and want to understand how I felt and what was going through my mind. Some people wonder how I managed to continue to be happy, stay “strong” and even determined to stay level headed. Some people expected me to be torn down and broken but with God, ALL things are possible, you hear me!? But I have been torn down and broken but I always have gotten up. I've thought that this is the end but believed that there is more to life than this and best believe I have lost hope because of what it looked like BUT if it wasn't for those praying for me! When my faith got shaky, encouragement flooded me. When I felt ugly, I was reminded that I am beautiful.  Things were not always sunny and every piece of news I got just felt like an emotional roller coaster. One minute, news would get worst and then better and then it just got worst and worst. Heartache after heartache. But with much bad came much good from Lupus and she is just that thorn in my side to humble me.  Even today, I don’t know where Lupus came from and the doctors can’t tell me. All I know is that stress played a major role in it. People do not believe it but stress CAN AND WILL KILL YOU—if you let it. Many people never heard of Lupus. I didn’t know what it was until I was diagnosed and even then, I was still confused. How could my body be fighting itself? I can't be upset and stressed because she will flare. So I have to be careful and not let things bother me, even though I let them. I can't worry about the little things. Besides that, I had to put my big girl panties on, suck up some strength, and go with it because I didn’t want to lose the battle to Lupus. I’m too strong and been through too much. Each battle makes me stronger and wiser. So here I am, writing. At first, I didn’t want to blog. But I love to run my mouth, so why not!?   Lupus may be apart of me but she has NOT and WILL NOT take over me.